The Twitter trap

Footballers. They just don't know how to behave, do they? You'd think with their multi-million-pound contracts and pampered lifestyles - not to mention their legions of devoted fans - they'd be able to resist mouthing off on Twitter and getting into trouble. Nope. Like the whorehouse and the undercover tabloid reporter before it, Twitter has become the latest tool with which footballers can embarrass and entrouble themselves.

First up there's West Ham striker Carlton Cole, who's been disciplined by the FA over comments he made during the England-Ghana game in March. 'Immigration has surrounded the Wembley premises! I knew it was a trap! Hahahaha. The only way to get out safely is to wear an England jersey and paint your face w/the St. George's flag!' the 'baller joked. Seems inoffensive to us, but we all know the FA has a strict zero-tolerance attitude towards player misbehaviour, snigger snigger.

Then there's Rio Ferdinand. This is really pathetic. Rio Ferdinand, Manchester United star and sometime England captain, has been told off by a member of Twitter staff for cyberbullying... Piers Morgan. Ferdinand had tried to cast aspersions on the site about the irritating chat show host's physique, encouraging to fans to tweet with the 'hashtag' 'piershasmoobs'.

I mean, there is literally no part of that sentence that doesn't make us want to kill ourselves. None.

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